Welcome to my blog post, please feel free to read on..
This is the post excerpt.
Welcome to my blog post, please feel free to read on..
I was talking to this guy on WhatsApp (we haven’t met) we were talking all day long like we usually do then one night as we were talking he suddenly blocked me on WhatsApp, I just saw that his d.p suddenly disappeared so I just thought that he was changing his d.p, so I went to sleep then the next day I messaged him but my messages did not go then I thought to myself that I should maybe message him using my brother’s phone and to my surprise his d.p was showing plus I could send a message that’s when I realised that he blocked me indeed. After some days he finally unblocked me on WhatsApp after I wrote him a message on direct message asking why he blocked me?? and he messaged me saying pardon me, I didn’t block you, I had a problem with my phone. My phone kept hanging. I had to rectify it yesterday… I can receive messages but I can’t reply, the display was having technical problems now its okay…. But why can’t he use someone else’s phone to message me like what I did.?? Anyway what do you think should I forget him or give him another chance and tell me why
I was watching a movie called 365 days, its romantic and sad but how I wish someone could just kidnap you and tell you that you have 365 days to fall in love or he will let you go if you don’t fall in love in 365 days… That can be so romantic but its only a wish isn’t that every girl’s darkest fantasy but they wont admit it. Doesn’t every girl wish deep down in their hearts that their life partner would be a bit possessive(like 3%) over them, I know I do
My life is a living nightmare which I can not seem to wake up from..I try to be positive and have positive thoughts but then reality hits me hard and the next thing I know am back in the DARK PLACE…. It is like am just a body who is breathing but I have no life, no social life much less a personal life at least the girl in midnight sun was going out at night and living her life as for me no I can not it is like am in a glass house where I can not go outside I have TV to watch and my laptop with me, am stuck in this house by circumstances….
I feel like am just passing through life while am dead inside… I know that alot of people have depression and anxiety and i can relate to people who have depression and anxiety but people can’t relate to me because I have no balance or you can say that am not stable..and no one knows what am going through atleast people with depression and anxiety have friends to talk to when they are going through something unlike me am lonelier than ever i have no friends to talk to, the friends I have had have abandoned me its like they rather not have anything to do with me or its like if they are friends with me they will have some weird disease.. And I can’t talk to my family coz i don’t want them to be stressed or worried about me.. So hence am the walking dead.
I feel like my life is a living curse, I can’t just live a care free life coz my life z full of pain, anguish and frustration. I wonder why pipo complain that their life z so hard when it’s not,that just frustrates me coz they can fix their troubles in life whereby I can’t coz I can only have hope and faith in GOD that everything in my life will be fine….
Am not an ordinary girl living in an ordinary world, am different, unique and special. I have learnt to accept that even though I did not accept it at first and I wasted a lot of time trying to be perfect hence I was so hard on myself and I was so depressed for a long time. But even though I don’t know what’s going to happen in future. what am gong to do in life nor what my purpose z in life. I know GOD z always with me and he will guide me in life…..
I feel like am trapped in my own body because I have this disease or disorder called cerebellum atrophy its basically the shrinkage of medulla oblengater which affects my walking and writing. So its hard for me to find a job because no one wants to hire a girl with cerebellum atrophy….. I feel so useless because am not good at anything…
The story of my life where no one takes what they say to me in consideration, they don’t care that the words offend me or not?? People say that what doesnt kill you makes you stronger and that saying is true but what people say to you really stings like hell…. I don’t like letting people in because I have got “DEMONS” inside me, my soul is dark so hence forth they will not stand my “DEMONS”. That’s how I feel I can’t help feel that so I just had to write it down..
My life is such a mess, I am remained everyday of my life that I am different and unique.I can hide how I feel from my family because I don’t want them to feel sad for me but when I go in the bedroom I just break down in tears thinking that all my friends and relatives have balance and can go out and have fun or do all the things I cant because am different I don’t have balance so like today am depressed because almost everyone I know is going out, am happy its just that I cant help myself…. Am writing because am depressed and the more I write the better I feel… So my life is a storm that is not ending!! BUT I HAVE TO KEEP FIGHTING AND BE STRONG
Today am just going to say what a wise man once said if you give kindness and love then life shall give it back to you but if you give cruelty and hatred then life shall give the same to you…
Is a person defined by their wealth, beauty, by their sex appeal or their personality?? If you answered by their personality then you guessed right but people always, when they first meet the person they start judging just by how the person looks which is wrong because if you are not beautiful enough then you don’t exist.. I know physical attraction is necessary but you need to put that aside and get to know the person